


Moonlight Challenge

by darknoonthirty



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-16
Updated: 2013-03-16
Packaged: 2017-12-05 11:05:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/722486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darknoonthirty/pseuds/darknoonthirty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Belle's POV post Miller's Daughter, after the phone call with Rumple. <br/>--</p>
<p>She laid in the hospital bed, curled up in a fetal position, sparse tears falling from her eyes as she tried to take in what had just happened. What had just happened?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Moonlight Challenge

She laid in the hospital bed, curled up in a fetal position, sparse tears falling from her eyes as she tried to take in what had just happened. What _had_ just happened?

Something deep inside her ached so bad but she couldn't find it. She could never find it. The pesky tugging kept bouncing around her insides and just as she was about to grab hold it would leap off to another hiding spot, only to nag her endlessly in unexpected moments. And yet this internal hide and seek felt strangely...good. She had come to the conclusion, one sleepless night, that she would capture this beast when the time was right. She vowed to the moonlight that peaked through her sterile hospital window hangings that until she could learn more about the monster inside of her, understand it, document it's habits, and inevitably slay it into oblivion, she would take comfort in the fact that something was trying to get out of her muddled mind. Even if that something hurt like hell and made no sense. But the phone call she just had was not making this vow to observe, report, and endure an easy task.

It hurt more than ever now. An ache she couldn't begin to understand in a place that was so deep she couldn't even fathom where to start her search. It was everywhere and nowhere all at once. All of this because of the first man she saw. The man that would not leave her alone despite every attempt, every jab, every horrible thing she could muster. (She still felt bad about shattering his chipped cup, it had seemed important to him. An hour after he left her that day she picked up as many pieces as she could and put them under her pillow, determined to make it up to him somehow. She took one of the bigger pieces out now, tracing it with her fingers as she let herself feel. ) This enigma of a man struck something in her.

She may not remember a lick of her life but she was no idiot. She noticed how her body responded to him when he was close. Didn’t miss the fact that after she was shot she wrapped her leg around him, as if to anchor herself. Noticed how she was happily kissing him back that morning until she realized she had no idea who HE was and that was just downright creepy. She was even aware of how her body shifted close to him when he brought the cup, even if none of what he said that day made any sense. And how could she not notice what was happening to her now? Crying over words from a dying man who called her sweetheart, who told her of the woman he once knew. Words like hero, goodness, love, creation, beautiful, and all of these applied to her in a puzzle she couldn't even see none the less solve. And yet these words made the beast inside her ache in such a way that all she could do was acknowledge it and let it feel what it had to feel for as long as it needed her to feel it.

How was she supposed to fight this? Supposed to make sense of a man that called her a name that fell on deaf ears that seemed to be attached to her brain? Supposed to see the soul and heart that he obviously saw in a body that felt both familiar and foreign to her at the same time? He told her to look at herself in a mirror and see the woman he wanted so badly for her to be, but that she couldn't be, maybe didn't even want to be. But maybe that was somewhere to start. Maybe if she could find the strength to get up and look at herself in that mirror across the room and mentally try on all these things he said of her she could she if any of them fit. See if she could find some shining clarity in his puzzle, no, in his challenge. That’s what he was doing. He was challenging her to stand up. To be this amazing thing he once knew. Well she will not be anybody's puppet; even if they are ruggedly handsome with eyes that she could look at for days and a voice that seemed to quiet the always humming monster inside of her. Even if they obviously cared deeply for her, enough to call her and say things they wanted any version of her to know, memory or not.  She will be her own person, her own self, whoever that is. But she will use this as someplace to start, see if she can remember anything, or, an even more appealing idea, see if she can find something new. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Just got inspired to write this after such an amazing scene. I love Belle so much and i hate that we haven't got to see much of her side of the struggle she's in. Don't get me wrong, i love where things are going, and can't WAIT for Lacey, but i just needed to try and explore a more melancholy side of her, for my own sanity.


End file.
